Welcome to The Vomiting Brain, a blog about nothing and everything headquartered in the remote syrupy northern enclave known as "Vermont".

Tuesday, December 22, 2015

My Strategy for Winning the War on Christmas

businessinsider.com
We live in frightening times.  As we speak an evil the likes of which has never been seen is threatening our way of life... Christmas.

Every year millions of Americans as subject to credit card debt, weight gain, time with family, rotting trees, and the relentless psychological warfare of Christmas music.  Our politicians fail to recognize this threat for what it is ignoring the rhetoric of Santa Clause himself:
He knows when you've been sleeping.  He knows when you're awake.  He knows if you've been bad or good so be good for goodness sake.
That's a not so thinly veiled threat and yet our President is too politically correct to utter the words "radical Christmas carolers".  I believe this is because many in our government are Christmas sympathizers.  I have good intelligence that our President may have even been born in Bethlehem (Israel not Pennsylvania) and his birth certificate is forged.

Saturday, December 5, 2015

A Very Strange Reading of the Second Amendment

The National Rifle Association and the gun lobby have perverted the public understanding of the Second Amendment.  If you were to listen to the NRA, you would think that the Constitution guarantees the right of anyone to own pretty much any gun they want, carry it anyway they want, and store it anywhere they want without the interference of government regulation.  The Second Amendment reads:
A well regulated militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed.
Leaving aside for a second that there is considerable evidence that the framers of the Constitution were talking exclusively about state Militias, a view held by the Supreme Court until 2008 when they ruled in District of Columbia et al. v. Heller; the NRA's interpretation of gun rights exceeds anything written in the text.

Friday, November 20, 2015

We Should Fear Ourselves



Events like those that just happened in Paris, Beirut, Ankara, over the Sinai, and just this morning in Bamako Mali are severely depressing.  Not so much the attacks themselves, but the subsequent response.  ISIS is terrifying.  They are a group with a nihilistic medieval ideology, battle hardened, well-funded, well organized, and there is no doubt that if they could, they would make the United States part of the caliphate.  Here is the thing though; they cannot even come close.  What they can do however, is provoke us into costly wars, to surrender our values and freedoms, and distract us from our own problems.

ISIS and organizations like them are not existential threats to us.  ISIS is not Nazi Germany, Imperial Japan, the Confederacy, or the Soviet Union and yet judging by the media coverage and the response of many of our political leaders they might be all that and worse.  Donald Trump has advocated a database and ID cards for all Muslims.   Jeb Bush has advocated religious tests for entry to our country.  John Kasich has advocated creating a new government agency specifically to promote Judeo-Christian values (whatever those are).  ISIS believes they are waging a holy war against the west and many of our political leaders are eager to oblige.

Governors and mayors of cities across the country are refusing to settle Syrian refugees fleeing the very people responsible for these attacks.  As if 10,000 refugees, a tiny percentage of whom could be here for nefarious purposes, pose a serious threat to a nation of 350,000,000.  These people are not leaders.  They are cowards and they are laying the groundwork for fascism.

Suddenly after an attack that did not even occur on American soil many of us are perfectly willing throw out other people's rights.  In 2014, there were 13,741 murders in the United States mostly committed by Americans.  Since 9/11, 26 people have been killed on American soil by Islamic terrorists and 48 by radical right wing groups.  Yet when it comes to round the clock surveillance on Muslims, racial profiling, torture, going to war, and purifying our immigrant pool there are plenty of people perfectly willing to go along.  Suggest gun control however, and suddenly these same people become civil libertarians.  In America, the Constitution is only important when it protects the alleged rights of predominantly white males.

Even here in Vermont, where we have a history of taking in refugees from Bosnia, Somalia, Sudan, the Congo, and elsewhere; the two Republican candidates for Governor Phil Scott and Bruce Lisman want to delay resettlement for Syrian refugees whom have already been waiting for years to enter the country.  This is despite the fact that Vermont has an aging workforce, shrinking tax base, and in the long run would almost certainly benefit economically from people dedicated enough to travel thousands of miles despite great cost and risk to go live in a strange new place.

The whole fear of Islamic extremism in the United States is illogical as fear often is.  After 9/11, we responded by invading and occupying a country that had nothing to do with the attack and was holding the various political, ethnic, nationalistic, and religious factions together via a secular (albeit tyrannical) regime.  Now there is a power vacuum and it has been filled with the most violent and fanatical fighters among them, ISIS.  This is a problem largely of our own making.

Perhaps the most difficult part of all of this is the realization that there might not be that much we can do about it.  National borders in the Middle East were drawn by colonial powers where ethnic groups we played off against one and other.  Brutal regimes were propped up and domestic politics were interfered with by outside powers.  Now Humpty-Dumpty has fallen and all the king's horses and all the king's men won't be able to put him together again.  The best thing the United States can do is not repeat the same mistakes that got us into this mess.

If we actually want to prevent terrorism, we should resettle as many of these refugees as possible.  Nothing lends itself to extremism more than ghettoized people with no hope and no prospects.  Is there better propaganda for ISIS then treating Muslims as second-class citizens or killing more innocence?  I don't think there is; it confirms everything they've already said about us. 
 

Wednesday, November 18, 2015

Today in Moronic Memes #5


This one has been floating around for a while on the internet. The first thing I'd like to point out about the policy of testing welfare recipients (and by the way, there is no program for "welfare" there are an assortment of programs with various eligibility requirements), is that the policy doesn't work and costs more to implement then it saves.  In Florida, the program was in place for several months and had a success rate of a whopping 2.6% ,while costing taxpayers more than it saved.  Additionally, Florida Governor Rick Scott was co-founder of a drug testing company, so in a way that very policy was a sneakily executed welfare program for Governor Scott.

Tuesday, November 10, 2015

The Art of the Grift


Gov-Huckabee-001.jpg
Wikimedia Commons
Something amazing is happening in this Republican presidential primary, it is my belief that many of the candidates including the two front-runners have no intention of ever being President or holding any kind of public office.  These candidates are after something far more rewarding, profitable, and easier...the grift.

The most obvious example of these grifters is Mike Huckabee.  Huckabee is running for president you say?  I can forgive you if you forgot, but yeah, I mean he is pretending to anyway.  Huckabee hasn't held political office since 2007.  He ran for President in 2008, which got him a nice seven years of a television show on Fox, numerous media appearances, book deals, speaking tours, and supplement sales.  Since 2014, Huckabee has made just short of 1 million dollars in speaking fees alone.  His show on Fox News gave him a reported annual salary of $500,000, and has used his fame and weight loss story to hawk "natural" diabetes supplements.  Huckabee gave up his show to "pursue" the presidency but rest assured he'll have a job at Fox News when it's all said and done.

Wednesday, October 14, 2015

That Time Jim Webb Killed a Man and Other Observations from the Democratic Debate

That was a surprisingly substance filled debate.  I say surprisingly because after CNN's intro with cheesy graphics, weird hype, and Sheryl Crow national anthem intro, I thought I had mistakenly tuned into Big Brother, the Superbowl, or some kind of professional wrestling match.  As it turns out, I had just tuned into a shitty news network.

A few thoughts on our candidates:

Hillary
 
  • Best quote: "No" when asked if she wanted to respond to Lincoln Chafee's criticism of her email scandal.
  • Hilary is great at seeming to give a firm position on something while not really committing to anything.  A lawyer through and through.
  • Hillary is a woman and she is running for President.
  • Worst moment: A tie between Snowden would have been given whistle blower protection and she still can't shake the Iraq war vote.
  • Overall, I think she did pretty well at least as far as superficial debate commentary goes.  She had a confident answer for everything, even if it wasn't a good answer she sounded as though she believed it.
Bernie

  • Whether you agree with the man or not, you can't deny the man is passionate and sincere.
  • He's an unpolished, unapologetic, angry old progressive, which is precisely what I like about him.
  • Best quote:  Well I don't have the exact quote handy, but it was pretty great when he went after the media for the obsession over Benghazi and Hillary's emails.
  • Worst moment:  He stumbled a little over guns.  Also he hasn't articulated the policy differences between him and Hillary clearly enough. 
  • Strong showing, but did enough people see it?
Tommy Carcetti Martin O'Malley

  • O'Malley is like the little brother of Hillary and Bernie.  He doesn't really differentiate himself from the other candidates very well.
  • Best quote: Can't think of one.
  • Worst moment:  He endorsed Hillary.
  • Boring.
Lincoln Chafee

  • Poor Lincoln Chafee.  Chafee seems like a genuinely likable person, but the man is just out of his league. But hey, he's never had a scandal. 
  • Best quote:  When asked about his vote to repeal Glass-Steagall: Chafee "I was appointed to office; it was my very first vote. Anderson Cooper: "Are you saying you didn't know what you were voting for?" Chafee: "I'd just arrived to Senate." Chafee you sly dog you.
  • Did I mention he's never had a scandal?  I know that's not something to brag about, but the man did hold office in Rhode Island.
  • Get out now Lincoln.
Jim Webb
 
  • Admittedly, I had only vague knowledge of Jim Webb.  I knew he was a war hero, a somewhat conservative Democratic Senator from Virginia, and that he had written some books.  What I learned last night is that he also (and I say this with no background in mental health whatsoever), is a tad off.
  • Best quote:  This is hands down the best quote of the night.  When asked about what enemies he is proud to have made, "I’d have to say the enemy soldier that threw their grenade that wounded me, but he’s not around right now to talk to."  He should have walked out right there.  Seriously, has any candidate bragged about killing a man before?  Possibly, Andrew Jackson.  In fact, there's a decent chance Andrew Jackson killed someone at a debate
  • Jim Webb, he's killed before and dammit, he'll do it again. 

Friday, October 2, 2015

You Suck at Data

Welcome to You Suck at Data, what will likely be a multi-part companion series to Today in Moronic Memes, pointing out flawed, misused, and logically inconsistent data usage.

Today's installment brought to us by the New York Times' columnist David Brooks.  Brooks takes on the issue of mass-incarceration and determines that the War on Drugs is not the problem:
The drug war is not even close to being the primary driver behind the sharp rise in incarceration. About 90 percent of America’s prisoners are held in state institutions. Only 17 percent of these inmates are in for a drug-related offense, or less than one in five.
Moreover, the share of people imprisoned for drug offenses is dropping sharply, down by 22 percent between 2006 and 2011. Writing in Slate, Leon Neyfakh emphasized that if you released every drug offender from state prison today, you’d reduce the population only to 1.2 million from 1.5 million.
While I don't dispute the number and I do believe people emphasize non-violent drug offenders too much, Brooks might be surprised to learn that drug possession and drug sales is just one part of the legal problems created by the War on Drugs.  A good rule for drawing conclusions from data, should be that the data needs to matter. 

Friday, September 11, 2015

Sometimes Your Dreams are Stupid


File:Facepalm (7839341408).jpg
Tim Green from Bradford via Wikimedia Commons

I can't even...
The 24-year-old from Hyderabad, India, has set out to break the world record for the most selfies taken in an hour. He is so dedicated that in August he quit his job as a research assistant at a hospital to train.
Far be it from me to tell someone not to pursue their dreams, but dude come on. Your dreams are idiotic.  I'd have more respect if he quit his job to pursue smoking pot, playing video games, and masturbating instead.

Tuesday, September 8, 2015

Today in Moronic Memes #4

Gidon Yoel Eilat via Vermonters for Replacing Bernie Sanders (Facebook)
I'm becoming convinced that a significant part of our electorate inhabits an alternate universe where rules of logic don't apply.  The Iran nuclear deal seems to bring out nut-jobs, well the nuclear deal and nearly everything else Obama has done, but I digress. 

It's one thing to believe that this wasn't the best deal we could've gotten (a plausible albeit dubious conclusion), but it is quite another to call it treasonous.  This is how the the Constitution defines treason:

Thursday, September 3, 2015

Ballghazi: The Grand Finale (Pending Appeal)

www.bostonherald.com
 I'm beginning to think Roger Goodell might not be worth $40+ million he collects in salary.  From Yahoo Sports:
In this case, the NFL argued that obstructing justice is a suspension-worthy offense. But Berman determined that the league acted improperly on two fronts. First, the league had never suspended a player for previously obstructing justice, and most notably only fined Favre for it. Second, the league never notified anyone that there was a change in the penalties for obstruction. Judge Berman determined that the NFL acted improperly when it failed to tell Brady or anyone else that this was the new norm.
The NFL also determined that Brady's "general awareness" implicated him in the deflation of footballs. But Berman pointed out that this also appeared to be a completely new – and totally unannounced – standard as it related to players. He cited a 2009 incident in which a New York Jets employee was suspended for the use of improper kicking balls in a game against the Patriots. But in that same investigation, Feely was left completely unscathed despite being the player who used the footballs in question. In his own words, Feely told Judge Berman that he had "no culpability" whatsoever when it came to league actions.
 To recap:

The league launched a multi-million dollar investigation into the deflation of footballs; an offense that they had no procedure for investigating and no high school level knowledge of the ideal gas law.  The league then made a determination that Tom Brady was "generally aware" that the balls were deflated after leaking false information stating that 11 of the 12 footballs were 2 or more PSI below regulation and failing there after to correct the reporting in the media.  Goodell then suspended Brady for four games a punishment wildly out of line with any comparable offense, especially the $25,000 fine mandated in the rulebook for tampering with equipment. The appeal of the suspension was brought before Goodell and upheld. Big surprise.

The NFL filed suit beating the NFLPA to the punch to get the case heard in a more business friendly court meanwhile leaking selected information including Brady's emails he handed over to the league.  The judge then urged the sides to come to a settlement because he would either uphold the suspension or not, but there wouldn't be anything in between, strongly hinting that he didn't find the NFL's case compelling.

The NFL clearly misread...everything.  Judge Berman overturned the suspension and the football gods smiled down on New England, the Patriots, Brady, his four rings, millions of dollars, and supermodel wife.

Meanwhile, Goodell (after failing at this, Ray Rice's suspension, "Bountygate", the lockout, the ref strike, "Spygate", and probably a bunch of other stuff I'm forgetting) returns to league headquarters where there is more than likely a mountain of cocaine being snorted by top league officials as they will jabber endlessly about what uniform violations are worthy of a lifelong ban or whether Jim Irsay can score some Xanax so they can finally fall asleep.


*I know this is not a particularly important story, but since it was heard in a court, it could potentially have an impact on other employees covered under collective bargaining.  If the suspension were upheld, it would basically be saying that any punishment is acceptable no matter how arbitrary or excessive, provided that the contract was vague enough.  That's a precedent I'd rather not have upheld.

Friday, July 17, 2015

Today in Moronic Memes #3

 

The warmongers are all a fluster, as they won't get a chance (for at least today) to send someone else to fight an expensive and dangerous war on their behalf.  So now they must criticize substantive diplomacy because Iran=bad.  Ironically, the neo-conservative hawk's disdain for this deal is shared by the very people they are supposedly worried about:  The Mullahs in Iran.  They are kindred spirits of sorts, after-all if you've called someone evil for 36 years; it's awful hard politically to negotiate with them.  

Thursday, July 9, 2015

ESPN: World Leader in Scumbags

Jason Pierre-Paul Endures Hand Injury After Fireworks Incident ...


Yesterday, ESPN reporter Adam Schefter published New York Giants defensive end Jason Pierre-Paul's medical records, showing that the player had his finger amputated after a fireworks mishap.  Does anyone else have a problem with this?

Medical records are explicitly private and nothing in those records is remotely of public value despite Pierre Paul being a public figure.  The only value here is ESPN Schefter getting to a story first and a conclusion that we all would have known about anyway after we saw the dude with a missing finger.

This isn't disclosure of a secret government surveillance program or corporate malfeasance.  It is publishing records of something that someone should have 100% expectation of privacy.  If you can't trust your doctors to keep their mouth shut then whom can you trust?

I haven't heard anything from ESPN yet on the ethics of this and honestly, I don't really expect to.  They only care when you call Roger Goodell a liar, a statement that is unquestionably true.

*Edit:  I realize it probably was not a doctor who disclosed JPP's medical records.  I doubt a doctor would risk his career for something like that.

Saturday, June 27, 2015

You Can Still Fly Your Racist Flag

Confederate flag: Where the 2016 candidates stand 

It seems people really have a lot of trouble grasping what the First Amendment actually is.  The Confederate Flag has not been banned.  If you are a private citizen you cannot be arrested for displaying the Confederate flag.  You cannot be denied equal protection under the law simply because of your racist views.  That's what the Constitution guarantees and nothing more.

The flag in South Carolina will be taken down off State property.  The State of Mississippi might take the stars and bars off their flag.  This is the result of people petitioning their government for change, something that is actually guaranteed in the constitution.  Additionally, I can exercise my First Amendment right to call you a racist and my right as a consumer if I desire not to buy stuff from retailers.  Freedom of speech is not the freedom from social consequences.  Lenny Bruce's rights were violated because he was arrested, not because people were criticizing him.

I fully support the rights of anyone who wants to fly the Confederate flag, the Nazi flag, or the Islamic State flag if you want to.  The rest of us are then free to call you a bigot.

Wednesday, June 24, 2015

No, the Nazis Didn't Enact Gun Control to Seize Power

A common theme among the selective-interpretation-of-the-Second-Amendment-enthusiasts is that the Nazis imposed gun control on the German people so they could assume power and rule with an iron fist.  Strictly speaking, Hitler and the Nazis did affect gun control; they made it easier to get guns, with the notable exception of the Jews whom they didn't exactly extend a whole lot of other rights towards.

There was gun control in Germany in 1919 in response to the Treaty of Versailles, which was vehemently opposed by Hitler in Mein Kampf:
Today our left-wing politicians in particular are constantly insisting that their craven-hearted and obsequious foreign policy necessarily results from the disarmament of Germany, whereas the truth is that this is the policy of traitors [...] But the politicians of the Right deserve exactly the same reproach. It was through their miserable cowardice that those ruffians of Jews who came into power in 1918 were able to rob the nation of its arms. 
Then in 1928 Gun Control was addressed again by the Weimar government with the Law on Firearms and Ammunition, which eased some of the restrictions on private gun ownership while simultaneously enacting strict licensing requirements.  It wasn't until 1938 after Hitler had been in power for three years that gun control was addressed again.

The German Weapons Act of 1938, continued to ease many restrictions on firearms in Germany including:
  • Gun restrictions only applied to handguns and were removed from long rifles.
  • Expanded the groups of people allowed to own guns including lowering the age of firearm possession to 18.
  • Gun permit renewal was extended to three years instead of one.
  • Jews were forbidden from obtaining a permit to manufacture weapons and ammunition (Forham Law).
The regulations were then extended later in 1938 with the Regulations Against Jews' Possession of Weapons.  That seems self-explanatory.

It never ceases to amaze me how in the age of the internet, with more information accessible to anyone then at any other time in human history, that people can so easily use quasi-factual arguments without being challenged.  Confirmation bias is a bitch.

If you think that gun control is what allowed the Nazis to seize and maintain power then a gun won't help you defend against tyranny, because you're too easily manipulated to begin with.

Sources:
Fordham Law http://ir.lawnet.fordham.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=4029&context=flr

Treaty of Versailles http://web.archive.org/web/20080509145908/http://history.sandiego.edu/gen/text/versaillestreaty/ver159.html

Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Today in Moronic Memes

 


I generally don't like internet memes.  On a good day memes can be clever and maybe point out irony, but more often they reduce nuanced ideas down to a couple of sentences to appease the intellectually lazy.  The above is one such meme with which I'd like to point out the following flaws:
  • First,"heroine" is a female hero; "heroin" is a drug derived from opium.
  • This baby is engaging in a logical fallacy known as the "straw man argument" that is misrepresenting the argument of your opponent.  As far as I can tell no serious person holding office, has suggested that we ban all guns and I am unaware of any legislation that has been introduced.  Furthermore, assuming for a second that those conditions I am unaware of exist, they certainly don't represent the vast majority of those whom support gun control.
  • There is a long history of humans doing drugs.  In fact, it's all of human history in every society in the world.  Demand for drugs is largely inelastic meaning most people will continue to buy them regardless of the price.  The demand for guns is likely fairly elastic meaning that beyond a certain point, most people won't be willing to spend that much money on them.  I don't think it's a stretch to say that the demand for drugs is far more widespread than the demand for guns.
  • Estimates for opium consumed globally per year are around 3,700 tons (United Nations Office of Drugs and Crime).  This number is most likely flawed do to the difficult nature of estimating a black market; however, given the concentrated nature of heroin you could probably meet American demand for heroin with one tractor-trailer truck of pure heroin.  Based on size it would be much easier to meet demand for guns rather than heroin.
  • Expanding on the idea of supply and demand, nearly all guns in the United States have legal origins, manufactured in large factories 100% legally, often within our own borders.  It's much harder to manufacture guns on a massive scale than it is to manufacture drugs.  Maybe that will change as 3D printing becomes more prevalent, but as of right now the argument doesn't hold water.
  • If your argument is that guns should be legal because illegal goods like heroin and meth are prevalent, then logic follows that you support the idea that heroin and meth should be legal.  I'm not saying that this is necessarily the worst idea, but that is what you are arguing...
  • Many countries with strict gun control have succeeded in reducing the number of guns and raising the street price of illegal guns.  Australia, which had a similar gun culture to ours, instituted strict gun control after a massacre and now the price of a pistol in Sydney averages around $15,000 (The Australian).
You might be able to convince me gun control is a waste of time, but you'll need to do better than a baby meme.

Sources:
United Nations Office of Drugs and Crime http://www.unodc.org/documents/data-and-analysis/Afghanistan/Afghan_Opium_Trade_2009_web.pdf

The Austrailian http://www.theaustralian.com.au/news/nation/gun-smuggling-linked-to-criminal-gangs/story-e6frg6nf-1226499388180

Will Sex-Bots Save Humanity?

 


From time to time, I engage in thought experiments concerning how weird the future will be.  I think about how humanity will cope with global warming, the enduring threat of global conflict, coming challenges from bacterial resistance, and the social, economic, and physical consequences from ever-improving artificial intelligence.  It is about the ever-improving artificial intelligence that I wish to expand upon today.  Artificial intelligence specifically relating to one thing that may save humanity or maybe destroy it:  Humanoid sex-bots.

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Whitewashing History

Why would anyone trust these people?
One of the more troubling trends to come out the past 15 years is the complete re-writing of the reasons we got involved in the Iraq War.  The reasoning behind the war now falls primarily on bad intelligence.  Simply if our intelligence hadn't been so wrong about weapons of mass destruction then the Bush administration wouldn't have led us into war.  I can forgive someone who wasn't politically aware at the time for believing this, but having been politically aware at the time; I can say that this is complete bullshit.

Part of the chorus of apologists is NY Times columnist David Brooks whom recently wrote an editorial oddly titled "Learning From Mistakes":
...The first obvious lesson is that we should look at intelligence products with a more skeptical eye.  There’s a fable going around now that the intelligence about Iraqi weapons of mass destruction was all cooked by political pressure, that there was a big political conspiracy to lie us into war.

Wednesday, May 20, 2015

I'm Not Sure You Understand the Concept of Free Speech

One of my interests is free speech, particularly on college campuses, so when I found a Washington Post editorial titled Trigger warnings, colleges, and the ‘Swaddled Generation’, I took interest.  The editorials premise was that leftists everywhere are suppressing speech on college campuses.  It has been about nine years since I have studied on a college campus, so maybe I am out of touch with what is going on, and I certainly believe that there are attempts by the left to suppress free speech and silence unpopular ideas.  Largely, people only really believe in free speech when it's not something that personally offends them.  The problem I have with the editorial is that the examples of this suppression they give are unconvincing.  The first example given is trigger warnings, a concept that I find rather bizarre, but not exactly stifling either.
This was the case recently at Georgetown University when Christina Hoff Sommers , resident scholar at the American Enterprise Institute and author of “Who Stole Feminism?,” was greeted by sign-carriers warning: “Anti-Feminism,” with the room number of a “safe space.”

Monday, May 11, 2015

The Least Important Story That I Find Absolutely Infuriating

It should come as no surprise to anyone who knows me that I am an unrepentant Patriots fan.  My bias is well documented.  Even taking this bias into consideration, if you believe that a four game suspension for playing with and "likely knew" about and was "generally aware" about slightly deflated below regulation PSI footballs, is somehow warranted, I want to thank you, because now I can disregard your opinion completely on all matters of consequence.

This story is not important.  Brady will still have millions of dollars and a supermodel wife and there are a billion greater injustices in the world, but this is complete bullshit.  The NFL is run by hypocritical billionaires and Roger Goodell changes his mind as the winds of public perception change.

It's not that I don't think Tom Brady cheated, I think by the ultra-high standard of "probably", "likely knew", and "generally aware" he probably did.  So what?  All teams break the rules.  Players on every team in the league use PEDs, teams routinely tamper with each others free agent signings, the entire league has engaged in collusion, every offensive line in the league holds every game, and up until a couple weeks ago the league didn't even pay taxes.

So I say fine.  You know what? If the rules are that important suspend Brady but hold the rest of the league to the same standard.  Jerry Rice admitted to applying stick-um illegally to his gloves throughout his career in order to catch passes better.  As of right now, Rice should have to surrender his records and the 49ers should have to surrender their Super Bowl victories.  Ben Rothlesberger "likely knew" that he sexually assaulted at least two women and was "generally aware" that it was wrong.  Kick Rapistberger out of the league and remove two titles from the Steelers.  In fact, remove all Terry Bradshaw's titles too, he admitted to steroid use and implicated his teammates in it as well.  Ray Lewis covered up a murder, please Baltimore, return your trophies.  The Colts and Falcons pumped noise into their stadiums they should lose their stadiums for a season.  The list goes on.

Given the history of Goodell dishing out punishment I wouldn't be surprised if much of it is overturned on appeal.  I say give Brady a $25k fine and be done with it, but instead the NFL continues to conduct itself as if it strives for the level of integrity of professional wrestling.  If the Patriots alleged cheating was so terrible, then maybe the NFL should return all the revenue from those games.  That's dirty money and the league should have no part in it.


Friday, May 1, 2015

Vote in Your Primaries


 


There are choices in the next presidential election and better choices in the primaries.  There is the possibility (albeit unlikely), that radically different candidates in either party could secure the nomination for president.  This requires however, that voters actually show up for something other than the presidential election.  If you want choice, you must vote in your primary.

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

De-fund the D.E.A.

Hey fiscal conservatives, are you looking for a government agency to de-fund?  Why don't you start with the Drug Enforcement Administration?  It seems like the DEA would fit the very definition of a useless government agency.  Even assuming we need law enforcement to enforce criminal drug laws (I'm not particularly convinced of this), why do we need a unique agency to investigate this particular brand of crime?  Isn't the FBI capable of investigating drug crimes?  They can't walk into any bar in America and find some coke?  If they can't, then they're too stupid to be cops in the first place.

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Hoarders: Chip Kelly

Chip Kelly's offense not a good fit for current Cleveland Browns ...



Chip Kelly needs an intervention, he has a problem hoarding bad quarterbacks. Currently on the Eagles roster, Kelly has 4 QBs with NFL experience:  Matt Barclay, Mark Sanchez, Sam Bradford, and Tim Tebow.  Add all these QBs together and you get a whopping 57% completion percentage, 158 touchdowns, 131 interceptions, and 55 fumbles.   Out of this group the best QB by far is Bradford completing 59% of his passes and actually scoring more touchdowns than turnovers.  Unfortunately, Bradford has only been able to stay healthy about 75% of the time and if there is one thing that usually doesn't get better with age in the NFL, it's injuries.

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

It's Tax Time!

 

It's time to do your civic duty and pay your taxes or rather for most of us, fill out a form to verify what the government already knows. It really is silly when you think about it, the IRS actually does your taxes exactly like you and if you make a mistake, they will correct it.  Hell, they'll even correct it if you made a mistake in their favor and then refund you for the correct amount.  So this begs the question, why do we need to file a return at all?  Can't they just send us what they think our income was and ask us to either verify it or dispute the amount?  Why all the extra confusing paperwork?  I don't know with certainty, but I would venture to guess that it has a lot to do with why our government often does silly nonsensical things: lobbyists.  Intuit Inc., the company that brings us TurboTax, ranks 702 of 16,793 in terms on campaign contributions according to Opensecrets.org.  Tax preparers like H&R Block also contribute substantial donations.

Saturday, April 4, 2015

And the Plutocrats Continue to Grasp at Staws...

Against my better judgement I continue to scour through the Yahoo homepage news-feed or as I like to call it "bobbing for turds".  This week's search led me to an article titled "Why Elizabeth Warren Is a Threat to America’s Growth" by Liz Peek at the Financial Times.  Peek's poorly written and scatterbrained editorial focuses on Elizabeth Warren and why she believes that Warren is destroying the American economy particularly entrepreneurship.

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

Money Going Down the Toilet


commons.wikimedia.org


Hey high school seniors, are you looking for a rewarding career? The new gold rush is on! From AFP:
Human feces contains gold and other precious metals that could be worth hundreds of millions of dollars, experts say.
Now the trick is how to retrieve them -- a potential windfall that could also help save the planet...
...A recent study by another group of experts in the field found that waste from one million Americans could contain as much as $13 million worth of metals.
I knew all that time on the toilet after the Chinese food buffet wasn't wasted.  Maybe Chris Christie can save our economy and maybe Ron Paul was right about reverting back to the gold standard.  I must reevaluate everything.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go do some prospecting...



Monday, March 16, 2015

Wait...What?

Is Mitt Romney actually going to step in the ring with Evander Holyfield?  Will Holyfield kill Romney?

The fight card:

Evander "The Real Deal" Holyfield:
Age: 52
Height: 6'2"
KO's:  29
Net worth:  Holyfield's net worth peaked at $200 million but now is only about $500,000 (Celeb Net Worth).
Career Highlight: Undisputed heavyweight champion and getting his ear bitten off by Mike Tyson


Willard "Mittons" Romney
Age:  68
Height:  6'2"
KO's:  0
Net Worth:  $250 million (Celeb Net Worth)
Career Highlight:  Amassing vast personal wealth through trading companies like baseball cards.

My prediction:  Best case scenario for Romney is a concussion and the worst case is death.  Worst case for Holyfield is being swindled out his remaining money. 

Is this going to be on Pay-Per-View?

Saturday, March 14, 2015

Should We Charge 47 Senators With a Violation of the Logan Act? No.

Tom Cotton official Senate photo.jpg
Sen. Tom Cotton
This trend of me defending people I find reprehensible is unsettling.  If I wanted to defend scumbags, I would have gone to law school.  I'm writing about the petition circulating right now asking that the justice department pursue charges against the 47 Senators who wrote a letter to Iranian leadership saying that any deal reached wouldn't be upheld after President Obama leaves office. The petition reads:
On March 9th, 2015, forty-seven United States Senators committed a treasonous offense when they decided to violate the Logan Act, a 1799 law which forbids unauthorized citizens from negotiating with foreign governments. Violation of the Logan Act is a felony, punishable under federal law with imprisonment of up to three years.
At a time when the United States government is attempting to reach a potential nuclear agreement with the Iranian government, 47 Senators saw fit to instead issue a condescending letter to the Iranian government stating that any agreement brokered by our President would not be upheld once the president leaves office.
This is a clear violation of federal law. In attempting to undermine our own nation, these 47 senators have committed treason.

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Free Speech Includes Racist Speech

There are few things I like less then fraternities, but racist frat brothers is one of them.  I'm speaking of course, of the Sigma Alpha Epsilon fraternity at the University of Oklahoma.  Members of Sigma Alpha were caught on video leading a racist chant.  Since the video surfaced, the University has shut down the fraternity and also expelled several of it's members.  The chant in the video was unquestionably racist, but also unquestionably free speech and expelling a student from a public university because of the content of their speech is unconstitutional.  I hate defending racists, but as someone who is politically outspoken, I would be a hypocrite not to defend the right of people to express their opinion no matter how disgusting you or I may find it. 

Saturday, March 7, 2015

Read This: All the Shah's Men

All the Shah's Men


All the Shah's Men by Stephen Kinzer tells the true story of Operation Ajax, the CIA lead coup of democratically elected Iranian Prime Minister Mohammed Mossadegh.  Democratically elected, secular, and moderate Mossadegh was a highly popular figure in Iranian politics.  In addition to the above qualities, Mossadegh was nationalistic and despised foreign influence which led to a feud with the exploitative Anglo-Iranian Oil Company (later British Petroleum) and the British Empire.

Monday, March 2, 2015

I'm a Terrible Eyewitness

I was driving east on I-84 yesterday through western New York, on a snow covered road, when right in front of my car two other cars collided at 60 mph sending each other spinning with one colliding into a guard rail on the right side of the road in front of me; the other colliding with a cable guardrail in the median behind me.  I managed to narrowly avoid being involved in the accident myself and pulled over.  I got out of my car to check on the driver of the car behind me (she appeared to be okay), while my girlfriend called 911. When I turned around to check on the other car, it was gone.

Thursday, February 19, 2015

Monkeys Are Hilarious

I like to watch a lot of nature programs because they're interesting, I can't get worked up about it, and animals are often funny.  From this viewing I have determined that monkeys by far, are the funniest animal on the planet.  In fact, they are funnier than most people.  They're smart, social, and always engaging in some kind of shenanigans.

Take this baboon for example;  she has a creative solution to tell this lion to piss-off:

This is how planet of the apes begins...

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Vaccination: It Does Affect Other People

RougeoleDP.jpg
Child with measles http://phil.cdc.gov/phil/home.asp
Browsing across my Facebook feed I came across this comment on the subject of childhood vaccination:
...I don't believe that a person's right to choose what is put into their child's body should be taken away though. Why should I be worried about unvaccinated children when my child is vaccinated? He should be protected if the doctors & scientists are so smart... -Unnamed Facebook friend's friend.

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Shoplifting vs. Grand Larceny

HSBClogoonbuilding.jpg
Source: Wikimedia Commons

Two articles caught my attention yesterday for different reasons.  The first article discussed banking giant HSBC helping launder billions and assisting in the evasion of billions dollars of taxes.  From the AP:

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

That Was Awesome!

Malcolm Butler intercepts the Russell Wilson pass to win the game. Source:  http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/malcolm-butler-lauded-as-super-769069?amp

 What a game! I'm obviously biased, but that was the most exciting Super Bowl I can remember.  These were clearly the best two teams in the league and they delivered for 60 minutes. I have the following thoughts:

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Ballghazi: I've Had Enough

File:Logan Mankins Tom Brady.jpg
Source:Wikimedia
 As a fan of the sport of American Football, I find the weeks prior to the Super Bowl rather annoying.  It's the time of year where people who've never watched, played, or even touched a football in their lives, manage to watch about 10 minutes of football in between chicken wings and form an opinion.  Some years I'm lucky enough to have my team in the Super Bowl and then I can enjoy the buildup to the big game.  As a fan of the New England Patriots, I've been more fortunate than most as this will be the eighth time in my life that the Patriots will have appeared in a Super Bowl (Eight! Suck it other teams).  But alas, after a thorough ass-beating of the Colts, a scandal of a most heinous nature broke involving footballs below regulation PSI, sullying my beloved Patriots' good name.

Monday, January 26, 2015

When the Surveillance State is Turned Around

Screenshot from Waze.com
As it turns out, police are concerned about the surveillance state too... when it's watching them.  From the Associated Press:
Sheriffs are campaigning to pressure Google Inc. to turn off a feature on its Waze traffic software that warns drivers when police are nearby. They say one of the technology industry's most popular mobile apps could put officers' lives in danger from would-be police killers who can find where their targets are parked.

Wednesday, January 21, 2015

DeflateGate: Stop Breakin' My Balls

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B7xDxzGCIAIwhzk.jpg
Source:  Gronk's Twitter
The New England Patriots are headed to another Super Bowl which means one thing, more allegations of New England cheating.  The allegations this time focus on the inflation or rather, the deflation of the Patriot's balls.

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Why You Should Be Skeptical of the Surveillance State

File:Mlk-uncovered-letter.png
This is a letter sent by the FBI to Martin Luther King Jr. urging him to commit suicide.
 It's been said that the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior; if this is true, then we should be very concerned about our government's surveillance programs.  In nearly every case when intelligence agencies are given the tools and very limited oversight these programs are abused. 

Friday, January 16, 2015

The Physiological Effects of Caffeine (Re-Post)

The Physiological Effects of Caffeine

Introduction: 

Caffeine is the most consumed psychoactive compound in the world. It is present in many foods, beverages, medicines and supplements. Caffeine containing foods and beverages have been consumed for a perhaps as long as 700,000 years (Snyder 20). Caffeine is a highly effective stimulant that has been shown to enhance mood, cognitive capability, alertness, and enhance athletic performance. When ingested, caffeine produces a number of effects on the central nervous, muscular, digestive, respiratory, and cardiovascular systems of the body.

Metabolism of caffeine: 

Caffeine is a water soluble compound and therefore spreads through the body rapidly to anywhere there is water. Additionally, caffeine easily passes through cell membranes. These properties allow caffeine to rapidly enter the blood stream where it is then cycled through the liver (60 Snyder). In the liver the P45 enzyme system produces a number of metabolites (Ruxton 16). This process happens over and over until all the caffeine has been metabolized (60 Snyder). Less than six percent of caffeine is expelled in urine and most of the drug is removed from the body in about 12 hours following consumption (Ruxton, 15). The rate caffeine metabolism can be altered by a number of other factors including liver disease or use of other drugs (Snyder 61).

Welcome to Vermont, Where the Weather is Always Doing Something

Sigh...

Thursday, January 15, 2015

Beware Green Lanternism

File:Elizabeth Warren by David Shankbone.jpg
Source: Wikimedia Commons
As the Presidential candidate carousel heats up for the 2016 election, I can't help but think about how terrible political coverage is in this country.  My specific gripe is how much importance is placed on the presidential election, while the other elections are mostly ignored. Without a doubt the President is the most important individual in our political system, however even he cannot take go to the bathroom without the consent of congress and the blessing of the judiciary.

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Slow-Cooked Short Ribs and Tangy Apple Slaw


I made these ribs this past weekend with some beef short ribs from a local farm. Tangy, spicy, sweet, and smokey, the beef was tender and peeled off the bone.  There was left over sauce at the end so I added water, slow-cooked it more, and froze it as stock for soup.  I served the ribs with some baked beans and tangy apple slaw which, unlike mayonnaise based coleslaw, is light and refreshing.  Enjoy.

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Hasn't He Suffered Enough?..No.

Source: Wikimedia Commons
The biggest failure of the Obama administration has been on civil liberties; in particular the prosecution of leakers.   Pvt. Chelsea Manning is rotting in jail, Edward Snowden is in exile, and former CIA agent and torture whistle blower John Kiriakou spent 30 months in jail.  So what happens when former CIA director and four star general David Petraeus allegedly leaks classified information to his biographer with whom he was having an affair?  Senators from both sides of the isle come to his defense.

Friday, January 9, 2015

If Your Forbes Editorial is Based on Kelso, You May Want to Rethink Your Career


I've noticed that over the past two years or so, the content of Yahoo's homepage has deteriorated rapidly, but as I am a creature of habit and a glutton for punishment, I continue to check it daily.  In my daily reading, I came across an editorial written by University of Georgia economist and Forbes contributor Jeffrey Dorfman called "When Did We Get Too Proud For Entry-level Jobs?"  Now admittedly, I read that title and was skeptical, but I decided to hear him out and keep an open mind.  Surely this economics professor would back up assertions with some hard data and force me to reevaluate my own biases.  In retrospect, I have far too much faith in the academic diligence of economists.

The Wire: If You Haven't Watched it, Watch it; if You Have, Watch it Again

Admittedly, there are some gaps in my television watching, I haven't seen Lost or Mad Men, but for my money the third and forth seasons of The Wire are some of the greatest television ever made.  The series stands alone as a critique of society.  At every level the failure of institutions is examined whether it's drug gangs, the police department, city government, schools, the white working class, or newspapers.  It is because of this biting criticism that The Wire is more relevant than ever as a social commentary.

Thursday, January 8, 2015

Why Not Just Buy All the Opium?

Opium Poppies-Source: Wikimedia Commons
Over the past decade, the United States has spent $7 billion dollars trying to eradicate opium in Afghanistan (Security Inspector General).  The result of this policy has been an all-time high in opium poppy production.  This crop has an annual "farm gate" value of $.85 billion dollars (Al-Jazeera) and contributes to the employment of about 3.3 million Afghans (Guardian) out of a total workforce of about 7.7 million (CIA World Factbook).  Given the relative expense and ineffectiveness of the current policy of interdiction and eradication, why not just buy the opium?

Baby It's Cold Outside

Took this at about 7am this morning and my porch is about 10 degrees warmer than the surface temperature in Montpelier.