My Strategy for Winning the War on Christmas

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We live in frightening times.  As we speak an evil the likes of which has never been seen is threatening our way of life... Christmas.

Every year millions of Americans as subject to credit card debt, weight gain, time with family, rotting trees, and the relentless psychological warfare of Christmas music.  Our politicians fail to recognize this threat for what it is ignoring the rhetoric of Santa Clause himself:

He knows when you've been sleeping.  He knows when you're awake.  He knows if you've been bad or good so be good for goodness sake.

That's a not so thinly veiled threat and yet our President is too politically correct to utter the words "radical Christmas carolers".  I believe this is because many in our government are Christmas sympathizers.  I have good intelligence that our President may have even been born in Bethlehem (Israel not Pennsylvania) and his birth certificate is forged.

A Very Strange Reading of the Second Amendment

The National Rifle Association and the gun lobby have perverted the public understanding of the Second Amendment.  If you were to listen to the NRA, you would think that the Constitution guarantees the right of anyone to own pretty much any gun they want, carry it anyway they want, and store it anywhere they want without the interference of government regulation.  The Second Amendment reads:

A well regulated militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed.

Leaving aside for a second that there is considerable evidence that the framers of the Constitution were talking exclusively about state Militias, a view held by the Supreme Court until 2008 when they ruled in District of Columbia et al. v. Heller; the NRA's interpretation of gun rights exceeds anything written in the text.